I'm looking to find myself lately
Or is it really myself I'm looking to find?
The old me?
The new me?
Am I still me me?
It's been a few years of self exploration and change around here. I'm guessing this is a cycle that never stops. There are times when I'm more aware. There are times when I'm looking for the changes, looking for what stays the same or not looking at all. Everything looks different through very small amounts of sleep. Sure in a day I may get 8 hours of sleep but it's been split up into 3-4 different pieces and goodbye REM cycle. But just one look in his face and I know it's all worth it. It's the ultimate love. Not a falling in love sort of thing but a crazy deep love that only keeps getting deeper.
Most of the times I can tell what his cries mean. And being able to make him smile or lull him to sleep never stops flooding my heart and making me smile.
I'm me but I'm not. True friends will stick around and figure out who I am with me...others will fade away. It's just another one of those cycles.
